Wednesday, November 5, 2008

You Talkin' To Me?

I resisted! I was in Walmart and Target today. Not at the same time, though it would be a neat trick if I could do it. Well, I could, but not in a bricks and mortar store. Hey, maybe that's how Al Gore invented the internet! He wanted to shop in two stores at once, to save gas and a polar bear somewhere, and it hit him. If he could shop via his computer at home with a smaller carbon footprint, he'd be helping the world and could keep two windows open at once! Alas, there'd be no cheap chocolate, but apparently he has found other sources of munchies since he left office.

Anyway, I did not buy any chocolate. I'll amend that to any MORE chocolate. Because really, I think I'm good. Maybe that's what happened in the election. Maybe the wealthy people and the almost wealthy people (depending on this week's definition by President elect Obama and his democrat minions), just felt like they had enough. There was enough money in the bank, and they had no debt, so they could be altruistic and take a tax hit. I tend to doubt it, since most people are buying the chocolate whether it's on sale or not, after all they're selling it to them, so why can't they buy it? But it's possible. After the rollicking '90s and six years of a war that most Americans are not really affected by maybe some people just felt guilty. Either way, I'm proud that I resisted today.

However, I did notice something peculiar. I happened to have purchased two very large items (a box of diapers and a box of paper)which did not go into bags. So as I left the store the Walmart "Greeter" stopped me and asked to see my receipt. I gotta wonder about this Walmart corporation. I guess they make so much money they can afford to have the person who deters shoplifting remember when a loaf bread, a dozen eggs and three bottles of milk cost a total of 10 cents. This woman was shorter than me, which as those of you who know me know, that means she was pretty darn short. She approached and asked to see my receipt. Now had I been trying to take a five finger discount (the big box of paper was heavy, let's make it ten)I could have just pretended not to hear her and walk a little faster than normal. I'da left her in the dust. I mean how is this woman going to stop anyone who is really determined to take the stuff and is a few inches bigger? It just cracks me up every time, what would happen if everything in life worked like this? Imagine what Manhattan or LA would look like if the bouncers at all the clubs were like this. Imagine if the poll workers from yesterday were manning the velvet ropes. Or refereeing a dog fight. Or prison guards.


Granted, there's not lots of alcohol and drugs at Walmart (unless you count the cough medicine and happen to have a meth lab),and the crowd there isn't always that tough, but c'mon Walmart, we know you're so rich you sneeze money, pretend you care!


If little old ladies can keep Walmart rolling in dough, I think 350 million Americans can keep our president from doing us all in.

5 comments:

Anonymous said...

I am not exactly sure where you were going at the end of this one? That Obama is just a little old lady who's shorter than you and is rich and can't do any damage?
Well to get back to the beginning of your post...We really hit the jackpot today when Target put their candy at 75% off. WooHoo. We proudly did not resist the tempations.

Anonymous said...

one day. Just ONE day, and already AN OBAMA APOLOGIST!!!!!!!!! I think I'm gonna throw up again.

Anonymous said...

about al gore. He certainly has gotten his munchies somewhere. he must have gained 50 lbs since being VP

Anonymous said...

saving gas and a polar bear indeed. hee hee hee

Anonymous said...

Receipt and bag checks at retail stores have increased over the past decade because few customers bother to question them. Fact is, a store employee can ask you for your receipt, but the inspection must be voluntary. Any attempt to force you to show your receipt or prevent you from leaving until you do so is unlawful detainment.

Merchants must meet the high legal standard of probable cause before they can legally detain a suspected shoplifter. Asking you to submit to a search of your property less than a minute after you bought it is pretty much accusing you of theft.

You can choose to play along, but if you don't feel like being treated like a juvenile delinquent, politely decline the search and continue out the door.