My previous post about Biology was misunderstood.
My brother thought I was making fun of him, when in reality I was remarking on this fascination that he, and apparently others in my family, have with flashlights. A fascination I was somewhat unaware of.
The other night we had a family simcha (my nephew's bar mitzvah), and all was going well. My brother, having read the post, opened his jacket and took out two small flashlights. He even turned them on to show me how good they were(man, one of them was really bright). I was properly enthused, and even commended him on his flashlights, though I MAY have wondered why he needed them in his jacket at a bar mitzvah.
The room was beautiful. It was bright, there were white tulle covered lights criss- crossing the ceiling, contrasting nicely with the dark carpet. I was admiring the balloon centerpieces and the general decor when my six year old daughter came up to me crying that her earring had fallen out. It was not an expensive earring (again, she's six), but she was upset, and afraid her "hole would close," so we started looking. We looked all around the table where she had been sitting, and my cousin (the nurse)even went UNDER the table to help search for it. After about ten minutes, I gave up, found my brother, and asked him for a flashlight so that I could see it better on the dark carpet.
I'm surprised you all did not hear the hysterical laughing that followed my request.
I didn't find the earring, though I did feel I had a better chance with the flashlight. I returned it to him, and could still here some slight chortling, but he was trying not to guffaw too loudly, since the earring was in fact, still missing.
We found it later in another kids hair, which is really odd, since these two kids are the same size, so I'm not sure HOW it fell into her hair, maybe mine was sitting on her knees on a chair? After a bit of back and forth due to fear of it hurting, my daughter finally let my cousin, I think BECAUSE she is nurse, put it in for her, and everyone was happy.
Especially my brother.
Thursday, July 29, 2010
Monday, July 26, 2010
Biology
Sometimes, even at an age when you are sure you know everything there is to know about your family, there are surprises still in store.
I was recently speaking with my brother(the lawyer), and he started waxing on about a flashlight he wanted. I was surprised, as I had been in his house a few nights before and he showed me three new flashlights he had. New, as in addition to the ones he already possessed. One on his belt, one on his key chain, and one that can be best described as a flashlight slash weapon. It was huge and heavy. He says it's for the car, but for a guy who sleeps with a bat next to his pillow, I tend to think it's multi-purpose for him.
Naturally, I asked him why he possibly needed another flashlight, and he informed me, that the one he wanted was a three! pack, and it was not for him. He said it was for our father. I was a bit taken a back, and I asked if the man liked flashlights, to which he responded "haven't you seen the flashlights lined up on his dresser? He loves flashlights, we all love flashlights."
I guess I didn't get that gene.
I was recently speaking with my brother(the lawyer), and he started waxing on about a flashlight he wanted. I was surprised, as I had been in his house a few nights before and he showed me three new flashlights he had. New, as in addition to the ones he already possessed. One on his belt, one on his key chain, and one that can be best described as a flashlight slash weapon. It was huge and heavy. He says it's for the car, but for a guy who sleeps with a bat next to his pillow, I tend to think it's multi-purpose for him.
Naturally, I asked him why he possibly needed another flashlight, and he informed me, that the one he wanted was a three! pack, and it was not for him. He said it was for our father. I was a bit taken a back, and I asked if the man liked flashlights, to which he responded "haven't you seen the flashlights lined up on his dresser? He loves flashlights, we all love flashlights."
I guess I didn't get that gene.
Sunday, July 25, 2010
Is This a Joke?
I heard a story on the news the other day about the evacuation of the Statue of Liberty because the smoke alarm went off.
Apparently, the entire evacuation took 5 minutes. I guess when you have people thinking this is it, 354 steps don't seem like much. "We're all gonna die!!!!" is a pretty good evacuation technique.
Then there's the little tidbit of info "the firemen got there after a 30 minute boat ride...." So what happens? The alarm goes off at the fire house that there's a fire on Liberty Island, and they hang out on the deck of the ferry as it slowly churns its way through the Hudson? Why not commandeer "The Beast," and get there a lot faster? Do YOU want to be stuck on an island with a 151 foot burning woman?
But the real kicker, the piece de resistance, the rimshot, if you will, is what caused the smoke alarm to go off. It was smoke emanating from the elevator.
Hmmm.
If I was in the Statue of Liberty on a 93 degree day, and was evacuated from the crown, you're darn tootin' it would only take me 5 minutes to get out. I'd be looking for someone in charge so I could yell:
"Waddaya mean ELEVATOR???????"
Apparently, the entire evacuation took 5 minutes. I guess when you have people thinking this is it, 354 steps don't seem like much. "We're all gonna die!!!!" is a pretty good evacuation technique.
Then there's the little tidbit of info "the firemen got there after a 30 minute boat ride...." So what happens? The alarm goes off at the fire house that there's a fire on Liberty Island, and they hang out on the deck of the ferry as it slowly churns its way through the Hudson? Why not commandeer "The Beast," and get there a lot faster? Do YOU want to be stuck on an island with a 151 foot burning woman?
But the real kicker, the piece de resistance, the rimshot, if you will, is what caused the smoke alarm to go off. It was smoke emanating from the elevator.
Hmmm.
If I was in the Statue of Liberty on a 93 degree day, and was evacuated from the crown, you're darn tootin' it would only take me 5 minutes to get out. I'd be looking for someone in charge so I could yell:
"Waddaya mean ELEVATOR???????"
Friday, July 23, 2010
Peeves
I had a lovely lunch yesterday with one of my nieces. At one point I got up to get a straw, and I passed a table that had been vacated, but the plates were still there. On this plate were about ten or more pieces of cubed feta cheese and about that amount, or more, of black olives. Quite obviously the remnants of a Greek Salad.
WHY WOULD YOU ORDER A GREEK SALAD IF YOU DON'T LIKE FETA CHEESE OR BLACK OLIVES!!!!! This particular establishment explains all it's choices, so if you order a Mediterranean wrap you know you are getting eggplant accompanied by lettuce,tomato and onion, and flavored mayo. You can't order a Greek salad in this place and not know what's in it.
At least we got a nice chuckle out of it.
Later, I was driving to pick up some of my kids from day camp when I came up to an intersection with a red light. I was the second car there, and the first car had his left blinker on, but was hugging the right side of the road. Of course when the light turned green we all needed to wait until all the cars on the opposite side of the road drove through the intersection, and I, and all the cars behind me who were going straight, needed to wait because there was no way to get around this fellow until it dawned on him to eke up a little, and we were all able to squeeeze through.
Now, I don't mind waiting when necessary, but this was just silly. Why was he all the way on the right to make a left. This is not the first time I've seen this. Wouldn't you then need to make a wider turn across oncoming traffic? I believe you would, and that's no safer.
Inspired by Johnnie Cochran I came up with a little two line ditty reminder, but it's a family blog. The second line is: "Let everyone pass."
WHY WOULD YOU ORDER A GREEK SALAD IF YOU DON'T LIKE FETA CHEESE OR BLACK OLIVES!!!!! This particular establishment explains all it's choices, so if you order a Mediterranean wrap you know you are getting eggplant accompanied by lettuce,tomato and onion, and flavored mayo. You can't order a Greek salad in this place and not know what's in it.
At least we got a nice chuckle out of it.
Later, I was driving to pick up some of my kids from day camp when I came up to an intersection with a red light. I was the second car there, and the first car had his left blinker on, but was hugging the right side of the road. Of course when the light turned green we all needed to wait until all the cars on the opposite side of the road drove through the intersection, and I, and all the cars behind me who were going straight, needed to wait because there was no way to get around this fellow until it dawned on him to eke up a little, and we were all able to squeeeze through.
Now, I don't mind waiting when necessary, but this was just silly. Why was he all the way on the right to make a left. This is not the first time I've seen this. Wouldn't you then need to make a wider turn across oncoming traffic? I believe you would, and that's no safer.
Inspired by Johnnie Cochran I came up with a little two line ditty reminder, but it's a family blog. The second line is: "Let everyone pass."
Thursday, July 15, 2010
How 'Bout That
Every now and then you want to live in a place that seems, at least in the suburban metro New York area, to exist only in books or movies. That feeling that people are really looking out for each other, and kids can have a fun summer walking around their neighborhood and biking to play ball with their friends.
In these parts the last two items happen, but the first is certainly on display...less.
However, the other day I witnessed the coolest thing. It was almost 4pm, a time when lots of day camps are done for the day, which means traffic on the busier roads in town as parents drive to pick up their charges. I was tootling in my vehicle down one of theses roads, where lots of cars were driving in both directions, when suddenly traffic stopped. I looked ahead, and notice a mini school bus from a camp out of the area was stopped and had his flashers on.
No one from the neighborhood goes to that camp, so he wasn't discharging any passengers. When I looked a little closer, I saw the driver had stopped and turned on his flashers to stop traffic so that a group of boys could cross the street to skateboard in a parking lot!
In these parts the last two items happen, but the first is certainly on display...less.
However, the other day I witnessed the coolest thing. It was almost 4pm, a time when lots of day camps are done for the day, which means traffic on the busier roads in town as parents drive to pick up their charges. I was tootling in my vehicle down one of theses roads, where lots of cars were driving in both directions, when suddenly traffic stopped. I looked ahead, and notice a mini school bus from a camp out of the area was stopped and had his flashers on.
No one from the neighborhood goes to that camp, so he wasn't discharging any passengers. When I looked a little closer, I saw the driver had stopped and turned on his flashers to stop traffic so that a group of boys could cross the street to skateboard in a parking lot!
Tuesday, July 13, 2010
That's Entertainment
We're not swimming this week, which leaves a few hours after camp that the kids need something to do. More me than the kids. We could come home and play, but part of what's great about this part of the summer is that we get home from swimming late enough that the kids eat dinner and go to bed. The house stays really neat. That's why I like to find things to do. Out of the house!
Yesterday I went to the park with my kids and two friends with their kids. The weather had really cooled off there was a gorgeous breeze. The two and three year olds had a grand old time climbing the playground equipment, and running around. The six to nine year old group ran around playing cops and robbers, then a really cute (and short) game of baseball.
It's so funny how the six year old boys have all the moves, stances, postures, but ability is still that of a six year old boy. They get so intent (and these are both very laid back kids) about the rules, and how to hold the bat, and they get in their stance and you think "this ball is gonna go outta here!" In reality, it pops up a little and dribbles over to the pitcher, who is standing about six feet from the batter. It doesn't matter, they had a great time, and the Mommies had fun too.
When we got home my kids nixed the supper that was planned (salmon burgers), and we improvised pizza bagels. Simply made with bagel thins (a new product from Thomas'...yaay Costco)sauce and cheese, then popped in the microwave. Not a first choice, but it was seven o'clock.
Today we went to visit recently married niece and see her very-not-three-year-old-proofed apartment. Not that it should be three year old proof, but I think we made her a little nervous. Luckily she had freeze pops in the freezer, and everyone was happy. We discovered the freeze pops as we toured her cabinets. After a little while I couldn't take it anymore, and I told her we HAD to look in her fridge. I mean really. Is there anything more exciting than looking in the fridge of newly married people, and seeing what delicacies are in there? It's a chance for them to go shopping and bring all the things into their homes that their parents never wanted to buy. It's not a stage that lasts long, because generally after the first time you realize WHY your parents never wanted to buy it, and then you don't either. There was some cool ketchup in there, and other delightful things, but I was disappointed.
THERE WERE NO PICKLES!!!! Forget newly married. I don't know how THIS particular person could have NO pickles in her fridge. My flabbers were gasted. We got over it quickly, and had a really nice visit, which was extended by a massive downpour, and the relative distance of our vehicle. So freeze popped and nail polished (not the boy)we took our leave, having injected an hour of chaos into an otherwise serene abode. At least we didn't break anything. I wonder if she realized she was our "activity" for the day.
Tomorrow.....who knows? Wednesday is sundae at Carvel.....
Yesterday I went to the park with my kids and two friends with their kids. The weather had really cooled off there was a gorgeous breeze. The two and three year olds had a grand old time climbing the playground equipment, and running around. The six to nine year old group ran around playing cops and robbers, then a really cute (and short) game of baseball.
It's so funny how the six year old boys have all the moves, stances, postures, but ability is still that of a six year old boy. They get so intent (and these are both very laid back kids) about the rules, and how to hold the bat, and they get in their stance and you think "this ball is gonna go outta here!" In reality, it pops up a little and dribbles over to the pitcher, who is standing about six feet from the batter. It doesn't matter, they had a great time, and the Mommies had fun too.
When we got home my kids nixed the supper that was planned (salmon burgers), and we improvised pizza bagels. Simply made with bagel thins (a new product from Thomas'...yaay Costco)sauce and cheese, then popped in the microwave. Not a first choice, but it was seven o'clock.
Today we went to visit recently married niece and see her very-not-three-year-old-proofed apartment. Not that it should be three year old proof, but I think we made her a little nervous. Luckily she had freeze pops in the freezer, and everyone was happy. We discovered the freeze pops as we toured her cabinets. After a little while I couldn't take it anymore, and I told her we HAD to look in her fridge. I mean really. Is there anything more exciting than looking in the fridge of newly married people, and seeing what delicacies are in there? It's a chance for them to go shopping and bring all the things into their homes that their parents never wanted to buy. It's not a stage that lasts long, because generally after the first time you realize WHY your parents never wanted to buy it, and then you don't either. There was some cool ketchup in there, and other delightful things, but I was disappointed.
THERE WERE NO PICKLES!!!! Forget newly married. I don't know how THIS particular person could have NO pickles in her fridge. My flabbers were gasted. We got over it quickly, and had a really nice visit, which was extended by a massive downpour, and the relative distance of our vehicle. So freeze popped and nail polished (not the boy)we took our leave, having injected an hour of chaos into an otherwise serene abode. At least we didn't break anything. I wonder if she realized she was our "activity" for the day.
Tomorrow.....who knows? Wednesday is sundae at Carvel.....
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