Unintentional Comedy

As much as the zoning meeting was, as most town meetings are, depressing, there was one aspect that cracked me up. One of the Board members both in look and and voice sounded EXACTLY like this guy:

No One Cares

The other night I went to a Zoning Board meeting at Town Hall. The illegal then made legal school across the street from my house was looking for variances (changes to the existing zoning code to allow them to do some work on their property that gives exceptions to the rules in place regarding how much open space is needed on all side of a structure/driveway, and the neighboring property and how much landscaping is needed)) to put in a circular driveway. I asked a lot of questions, and knowing it was a fait accompli before anyone had even stepped in the room I appealed to the board, on the record, to remember that this was a residential neighborhood, and removing all grass and trees is not in keeping with that. (I kept thinking about the semi-legal shul next store to this barely legal school, and how they may experience some flooding once all surfaces are turned to blacktop-surfaces which  they are downhill from).

The saddest part of the evening was not that I would need ten feet from my neighbors property to put up a shed, and this house/school can have almost NO setback off the street. No, the saddest part was the diner owner who stood up, and in an impassioned speech talked about what he went through when he put up his diner, how the board limited him to a small facility, with a specific amount of parking, and now the board was  being asked to approve a 225 seat family style restaurant (as the lawyers said, an Applebees or Outback Steakhouse) in a shopping center that happens to cross over into their jurisdiction.  It broke my heart to hear him, in his Greek accented English beg the board to do their duty, the way he swore to protect the Constitution when he became a citizen. Compounding this travesty was when the usual suspects (read: developers of other projects) sat there shmoozing or laughing, or when members of the advisory board (Town lawyer, Town buildings people) were obviously not listening. (they are not the main board, just the advisory board who basically tells the board what to do).

The room was full of badly dressed lawyers, sleazy lawyers, and maybe six or seven people there to try to ensure that their neighborhoods or livelihoods not be destroyed. I don't think the people who are in that room once a month realize what they can do, what they have done to neighborhoods all across this town. Aside from the diner owner there was the gas station owner concerned that the Super Walmart attached to the restaurant strip mall would put him and all the other gas stations out of business. "What they sell it for is lower than my cost." There were the group of neighbors trying to stop a two family house from being erected on their quiet street with single family homes (that case was pushed to next month).

The boards, planning and zoning, are clueless. But at some point, even for the dumbest people a lightbulb must go on and they must SEE what they have wrought. I guess they enjoy being in the inner circle, knowing Mr. Sleaze Lawyer and his cronies, knowing the buildings guys, knowing the corrupt Town Supervisor. It's the lowest level of power and they relish it.

I have to believe that these people are just stupid. Dumb as posts and unaware. The alternative is that they just don't care.

That's the saddest of all.

Ready For His Close-Up

The two year old boy seems to get this "internet thing."  We went fruit/veggie picking yesterday, and I captured a great shot of him...well great for this blog, anyway....

Watch Your Language

There is a word people are using, not really knowing how offensive it is. Or so it seems.

As much as we are a family blog, please shield your children, I am about to reveal this word that apparently should not be uttered, or printed:

preg·nant

¹    [preg-nuhnt] Show IPA

adjective

1.

having a child or other offspring developing in the body; with child or young, as a woman or female mammal.

2.

fraught, filled, or abounding (usually followed by with ): a silence pregnant with suspense.

3.

teeming or fertile; rich (often followed by in ): a mind pregnant in ideas.

4.

full of meaning; highly significant: a pregnant utterance.

5.

of great importance or potential; momentous: a pregnant moment in the history of the world.

Those of you who read Mishpacha Magazine know the kerfluffle that ensued after they ran a thought provoking, heart wrenching, well done article about the pros, the cons, and halachachik outlook of the 20 week sonogram.  This invited a flurry of pearl-clutching letters, a mailbag full of "won't someone think of the children!!"  missives, and a lot of bewilderment on the part of a lot of people. However, there are people who knew about this. To wit: A sign at the local grocery for Kalei Tzom(pills that make fasting easier):

I got nothin'.

Sandcastles in My Mind

My good friend went away for a few days, so we enjoyed the company of her four year old. I dropped off all the kids at their various day camps on Thursday, knowing that our house guest was taking her leave of us. Her older sister was picking her up and taking her home.  Somehow, this triggered something in me.

Right then and there at 9:32 in the morning I decided on a plan for the afternoon. Typically we go swimming, but I just had a strong desire to DO something, and something good and summery. The decision was actually shocking, I couldn't believe not only that I had thought of it, but that I really wanted to do it.

We went to the beach.  Not our usual beach. As much as that lake has a nicer crowd, beach access is down a hill across a street and down steps. Which is fine when there are lots of big hands, but three little kids and a a little bit of stuff would have made it difficult.
So we went to a very large beach in the same area (20 minutes from the house). It's crowded, but easy to get to, easy to find a spot, both parking and at the water. It helps that we arrived at 4:00, and Yay! there's no fee at that time.

An hour and half at the beach, on the sand, in the water, happy kids- a really fun time. My hatred of the beach was not present due to the following factors:

1. There was no food involved. All we brought were water bottles (I had snacks in the car for the way home). This eliminated the constant asking for snacks when I wanted them to be playing and enjoying the sand.
2. We brought one bag with towels and water bottles, sunscreen and t-shirts, one chair, one bucket of sand toys. 
3. It was just my little kids and thus there wasn't sand EVERYWHERE, since there were no beach blankets or tons of towels to keep track of, everything stayed clean and dry in the bag or over the chair. It also stayed clean and dry since there was no food, and thus they did not hover around the chair.
4. No one needed the bathroom
5. I knew about how long we would stay, since we got there at 4 and the beach front closes at 6.
6. No one asked to leave and had to wait until more people were ready to go.
7. They behaved really well.

This is not to say that I won't be excited to go to the beach with the whole kit and kaboodle (i.e., cousins, see the link above) . Though whole kit and kaboodle has gotten smaller as the big girls work, and don't swim in public, and the little boys aren't so little anymore!

A nice slice of summer that was just "hey, let's go to the beach!" and it worked.

Yay!

Easy Fix

As prices at the pump rise, and fall slightly, the cost of airline travel has gone up. Jet fuel is expensive, apparently, and airlines are looking for more ways to make money.  Checked bag fees, carry-on fees, charges for snacks, it's all about the airlines looking for ways to eke out a few extra bucks from the customers.

Some airlines now charge for seat assignments, which if you don't want a computer generated, random seat, which may or may not put all the people in your party near you, you need to fork over some extra ducats.  This has caused a bit of an uproar as people, and of course the camera loving Senator from New York (not that he's not people, he is) Charles Schumer, decry the idea that children can be separated from their parents. Airlines, they say, should not have to bend the rules to accommodate families, and families should not pay extra to sit with their kids.

I agree whole heartedly, but the FAA and Congress  need not get involved.  Just get on the plane with your 2 year old, or five year old or seven year old, and be a good little sheep and sit in the seats you were given.  I am willing to bet the flight attendants will change your seats right then and there. You won't even have to ask. Just make sure your ten year old pulls out the messiest gooiest treat he can find, and have him shout up or down th aisle to talk to you, and your seat mates will be clamoring for a switch.  Better even, strap your toddler's car seat between two strangers (since the window and aisle seat are "premium" it's likely that's not what you will be assigned), and let nature take it's course.

If parents would do this, consistently, for one week, and not try to make the change quietly at the gate or the ticket counter, all the passengers on the plane become involved (pre-flight entertainment), and the pressure on the airlines would be the old fashioned kind.
Disgruntled customers with blackberries and ipods who will not wait until they are off the plane to send an email voicing their complaints.

I'd love to see it happen.

Peanuts and Cracker Jacks

A few weeks ago, knowing that we'd only have the "littles" around we bought tickets to the local minor league team (NO! INDEPENDENT LEAGUE!!!). We picked a Thursday night, because that's when they have Fireworks! I checked and double checked, because they were having Fireworks on Tuesday night and Wednesday night, but it still indicated that that Thursday night there would indeed be fireworks.

That was until Monday. That's when I got an email (as I do regularly) with a list of promotions for this week. Thursday no longer indicated fireworks. Gulp!

I love Fireworks. Love them. This year, due to a very, very exciting event we were (happily) unable to attend the Town fireworks (which in itself is a ritual of summer. They are not far from our house, so we pack a chair, some water, a blanket, spray huuuge amounts of OFF! all over ourselves and walk fifteen minutes to sit on a great lawn with most of the community, and watch the show. Even better is walking back, with all sorts of neighbors, and friends of neighbors who park in their driveways, masses of humanity that you really don't get in the suburbs-masses of humanity is a relative term).

Unhappy with the prospect of no fireworks after the game, I called the number provided on the website, explained the problem, and was transgferred-to a full mailbox. So I tried again, explaining my situation a second time, and explaining my desire to exchange the tickets for Tuesday night, so that we could get fireworks. This time the guy explained that "the box office decides, but there are no refunds or exchanges, but I will transfer you." At least this time I knew where I was being transferred, and when I got the same full mailbox I drove down to the box office, and exchanged the tickets in under five minutes.

Now I had to find a babysitter. I had one for Thursday, but she was unavailable for Tuesday, turns out she was going to the game. Her mother also loves fireworks ( we ARE related). I finally found one at 5:20 this evening. We left to the game an hour later.

We had great seats (they all are, really), the game was fun, the "oldest home" had a fantastic time, and the fireworks did not disappoint. In fact they were incredibly abundant, the soundtrack that accompanied them appropriate (though I am not a Springsteen fan), and really had some cool effects.

It really made me think of how fortunate we are to have this country, and how much gratitude we must have for it. Like all things human there are certainly flaws from the past, present, and likely the future, but for as long as it lasts, this is place that treats us well, and lets us live in peace. I am completely aware that this by the grace of G-d, but the human messengers  or conduits of this benevolence have my gratitude.

There is something magically about sitting in a small stadium on a warm summer night watching a gorgeous sunset, a decent game of baseball, a smile on your kid's face, and the wonder in her eyes as she watches the sky.

Baking in Bal'more

Wednesday night we had a wedding in Lakewood NJ. I opted to take the "oldest home" (8 years old-she was invited) with me, to give her that extra sense of "oldest.  And it was a family wedding ( a first cousin's kid getting married), so she had a great time, met some second cousins, felt so mature, and went to sleep at 1 am.  We were still in the midst of swimming lessons (in the evenings from 6-6:45), and we had missed one already, so we left to the wedding pretty late, which is why we got back late, which is why we changed our plans from leaving to Baltimore Thursday evening (after lessons) to leaving Friday morning (after a decent night's sleep!)

Thursday was a pretty hot day, so we went swimming after camp. Then it was time for lessons. Hmm. What about dinner? Well, it's the summer with just a few kids home, so the pizza store at 7 pm was on the agenda! It was so much fun. We met some cousins from out of town there, got back home, packed, and got ready for the next day. 

We had a good early start on Friday. We left at about 9:45, and drove until about 40 minutes out of Baltimore where we stopped to wash. We went straight downtown to Port Discovery (the children’s museum)the girls and little boy had a great time, and they loved the climbing, and lots of imaginative play ( a really cool diner, gas station, and supermarket). Some of the older exhibits were showing their wear, and it was very crowded with day camps, but we managed to move from exhibit to exhibit either behind or ahead of the crowds.

It was about 100 degrees in Baltimore, so when we left the museum we stopped at 7-11 next door, and had ice cream. Then we drove to Aunt and Uncle to visit, then on to our destination, my cousin. The one who was so good to us, and welcoming and comforting when we were first married and living in Baltimore (I cannot adequately describe how much I owe her). We got ready for Shabbos, and had a lovely meal. As we all went up to  bed, there was crazy lightning, like the kind you see in cartoons. Continuous flashing. The kind I had only seen once before...four years ago in Baltimore!.  Then it thundered. Lightly. But I knew the "oldest" would freak,and we had let her stay up,  so I went to her room. 

Just. In. Time.

Aside from the crazy CONTINUOUS lightning, the wind was so strong I literally thought there would be a tornado, there was crazy noise that sounded like shaking metal, which I was sure was hail (our hosts confirmed it was, the next morning), but she was so freaked I didn’t want to look. Then I fell asleep for about three minutes. I woke up and there were no lights, the clock was off-BLACK OUT! But I had only fallen asleep for three minutes, so we were still in the midst of the storm. That’s when the THUNDER!!!!!!! started. It was louder than any thunder I had ever experienced in my life. And the other girl woke up SCREAMING, but I was right there, so it was ok. MBB came in too, and let me tell you, it was wild and scary. The wind was about 70 miles an hour. We heard later that it was like a hurricane, just without the 3-4 day warning. It's called a derecho.

The next morning the power was still out, but strangely their house stayed really cool and comfy, so we managed quite well, just no chulent. At about five we walked over to her daughter, who we had heard (from a neighbor) had electricity. Another cousin and Aunt and Uncle were there too. It worked out really well, since at no time did we hang in our hosts' house in the dark without the ability to turn on flashlights or candles. So the kids went to sleep really late, but we really had a nice time.  Because of the blackout, the wedding of another first cousin's kid we were going to go to on Sunday in Baltimore changed venues, and thus the time was pushed to 6 pm (instead of 3) which messed up our plans, as we didn’t want to leave Baltimore later than 6, and it was so hot, and so many people across the state were without power, that we opted to skip the Aquarium –we figured it would be mobbed-indoor-air conditioned-and just started to make our way home.

We stopped at MBB's office, a real treat for the "littles" and of course Wawa, and then we came home. Straightened the garage , unpacked, and off to the local fast food place for dinner followed by baths, and bed. It was a really nice, really long weekend. 

I can't wait for what's next!