Snip, Snip

In honor of the little man's third birthday in the hebrew calendar, I snipped a little of his hair. His hair that is totally rocking with his sleeveless shirts and shorts. His hair that is getting cuter, but that I can't wait to cut.

But we are waiting. We are waiting for his grandparents. So the son of the woman who loves short hair is having his Upsherin delayed by two weeks. I appreciate that G-d did not laugh at me, and give me a kid with thick very long hair, instead we are just waiting longer than we thought.

With all this time to wait, I've been thinking about people who "do upsherin" even if it isn't their custom. At first I thought, they think it's frummer, but then I decided that's not it at all.

Growing up Yekkish meant growing up with customs that were different from everyone else. Today, in this global world, people have melded together into a big melting pot of Judiaism, with a lot of Chassidim keeping only some of their minhagim, without the whole look (bekeisha, streimel, seamed stocking, hat on sheitel, etc). Because there are so many chassidim, they have integrated into yeshivish communities, and now "mainstream" Jews (not yekkish, not chassdish people) are faced with a new phenomenon.

They are not doing what everyone else is doing.

They aren't used to this. I think communities were probably more homogenous years ago, in terms of backgrounds, and now with the mix of peoples, this is startling. Things that they had no idea were even a custom, as opposed to a law, because EVERYONE they knew did the exact same thing, suddenly revealed as "flexible."

Now, many who come from backgrounds with strong traditions, and a need to remain insular would never see a custom as something to be flexible about (unless of course it's someone else's custom, then it's...worthless-which as a side point: if someone says they are "machshiv minhagim," but are only "machshiv" their own minhagim then they are disingenuous, and in fact are not at all machshiv minhagim, they are just chauvinistic.). But for those who had no idea that their way was not the only way, and a need to fit in with ones neighbors, has given rise, in my opinion, to many more people waiting to cut their boys' hair.

So bring on the scissors, and no, there will be no vimpel (sunday, rosh chodesh-the wave of the future), as much as I would have liked it, it is not the custom for this family.